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Showing posts with label the marshmallow test. Show all posts
Showing posts with label the marshmallow test. Show all posts

Fr Girls Don't Eat in the Street

I've been living in Paris 3+ months and I can say with absolute certainty that Fr Girls do NOT eat in the street. I've had almost no period of adjustment to Parisian life except in this one arena. As an adopted New Yorker, eating in the street is not only completely acceptable, it's preferable. Sitting down at a table to eat is for out-of-towners. Well I think so...
History bears out my assumptions. Just look at these Fr Girls at the beach in Deauville (in Eugene Boudin's painting currently at the musee Jacquemart-Andre). Not a single one of these gals is sipping a cuppa or holding a drippy ice cream/glacé. What fun is that? Why go to the beach and not eat? Heck
Thanks to British Pathe films we know Fr Girls in the 50's kept their hands securely tucked into muffs.
Is it any wonder the iPhone took off like gangbusters in Paris? Something to clutch instead of a ham and cheese baguette sandwich non?
And the proliferation of little dogs in Paris keep their mistresses hands very busy.
On the weekend I went to PAD - an avant-garde art and design expo in the Tuileries. There were plenty of Fr children absorbing the artworks but not a one was munching. I was the only stealth-eater with my Madeleines (instead of being the only stealth shooter - photos were allowed),
Back in the street Fr children are encouraged to hold onto their baby sister or brother's pram instead of a lollie. Some of them ride on the back, holding on for dear life instead of snacking. All basic distraction techniques
And yet paradoxically this town is world famous for its pastry and sweets. Go figure.
True there is a designated food break in France. L'heure du gouter or snack time is around 4:30pm when everything is allowed (though NO eating on the street ever).
In a city rampant with temptation I'm going to the pool regularly to compensate. I just found out today with my pool card I can visit more than one time a day. Three..four..five times in one day! This may become essential with my bad snacking habits. 
The walk home from the pool is tortuous littered with excellent boulangeries. Here is yesterday's post-pool 'reward'. Ouf
Today I went armed with a sliced apple. Believe me when I tell you the Fr do not even bring an apple to their lips out in the rue. Nevermind that, I need some time to adjust. I even chose a different route avoiding yesterday's Chausson au pomme like the plague.
No go. I waltzed right into boulangerie Maison Privat, grabbed a palmier and made for the door. At least I left half uneaten but what's to be done? Will I ever acclimate? Do I stand a chance in this town as a life-long street-eater? And what about when Summer comes and there's ice cream on every corner? What then dear PB readers? I see doom and gloom on the horizon. Can you suggest something?
Paris is not the paradise you imagine.
This giant poster in Sephora's windows may be my only hope - a pacifier. Come live in Paris. You'll soon see. Just you wait. Humph
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Pamela Druckerman

 Last night I heard Pamela Druckerman (author of my fav book, Bringing Up Bebe) talk at Barnes & Nobles. Pamela spent three years researching/writing her book while raising three children in Paris. She never expected all the controversy or enormous interest it's aroused. She thought perhaps only new moms or grandmothers would read it. In fact there is interest world-wide. A French edition will be coming out. The French want to know what their doing right!
 Reading BUB as an aunt/grand-aunt, there are many things I would do over given the chance. But mostly I find Pamela's book full of clues to what makes the French tick. My copy is a wreck of notes and yellow underlinings.
 French enfants are nudged onto 4-X-a-day set feedings exactly when the whole family eats. Is it any wonder the French have low obesity (8%)?
8am-12noon-4:30 snack-8pm
That's it.
No snacking in between.
French children learn to wait for mealtime.
 Isn't 'La Formule' (entree+plat+dessert) served in French restaurants at noon a continuation of the 4-course lunches children eat at la creche?
  The French Paradox may be more about eating in moderation at set times than drinking wine.
 French enfants are given their first doudou at la creche. Is it any wonder they remain attached to stuffed animals? Where are the cashmere bears at Donna Karan's?
 Cashmere for him, for her and a giant panda too. Childish playfulness is ongoing for the French in my opinion.
 Everyone, young and old, loves nounours/chocolate marshmallow bears.
 Why is there no serious museum in NYC with ongoing + new toy exhibitions like Musee des arts Decoratifs?
 A French passion for the things of childhood (including La vache qui rie cheese)...
 Creates an inherent playfulness in French culture as I see it. Spritz yourself in Bloomingdales with perfume and you'll be set upon by staff. In Printemps/Galeries Lafayette it's a free-for all. Spritz and play as much as you want. No one cares or expects you to buy.
 If you want to see French parenting in action take a stroll down rue Vavin, 75006 - a pedestrian street. Or read Pamela's book if France is not on your menu.
(Just two weeks to go!)
 I plan to eat a lot more fruit compote (merci Pamela) this time in Paris...
And less peche mignon(forbidden pleasures).
And only at set meal times! So that's my take away from Bringing Up Bebe.
I'd love to hear yours.
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Bringing Up Bebe

 Have you wondered how come French kids are so bien-eleve/well-behaved?

 They don't seem at war with their parents

 Ex-pat American Pamela Druckerman's Bringing Up Bebe has many answers I'm seeking.

 Plus (perhaps unintentionally) what makes the French...so French. Why the culture is the way it is. Even why French women are thin.

 It begins in infancy and even before. French women experience pregnancy as a 'spa' period to lather attention on themselves. Pregnancy is not thought of as a 'personal research project'.

 Druckerman, a former Wall Street Journalist,has been living in Paris for 10 years with her British husband. As a new Mom with 3 young children she became curious about French parenting. Should her first-born enter a creche/French daycare at 9 months? Would this effect her child's development? Where were alphabets in the classrooms? What were tots 'learning'? 
Compassion and respect for others.
Read Judith Warner's reponse in Time.

 Fr parents create a secure 'cadre' or FRAME(not a box) for a child to grow and discover life within. "The French believe it's important to be very strict about a few key things, but then to give kids as much freedom as possible about the rest. You can really see this at bedtime. French parents tell me that at bedtime, their kids must stay in their rooms. But within their rooms, they can do what they want", from a Druckerman interview.
 Learning manners is foremost in French upbringing.
Have you walked into a Paris shop/cafe, asked directions of a French policeperson without saying 'Bonjour' first? Then you know the importance of Bonjour + au-revoir, merci, s'il vous plait.
 Parents assert authority when needed with 'non' and 'les gros yeux'/the big eyes to let a child know when they've stepped over the limits. Druckerman says," 'the big eyes' works best when there is mutual respect...strictness comes with flexibility...giving kids autonomy and choices"

 French children learn early to wait/attend. To deal with a bit of frustration.

 The way French parents and children deal with food is such an eye-opener. I'll post more tomorrow on that one. For sure most French children could pass 'The Marshmallow Test' with flying colors. Instant gratification is not encouraged. Learning to wait is.

 Many French toddlers bake every weekend. With parents nearby but not directing much. I was allowed to put a raisin button on the gingerbread man and lick the bowl (not allowed for Fr children). That was it. I never got to make anything from scratch by myself. No wonder I can't bake #$@ macarons.

 I'm always interested to see the plethora of children's cookbooks in France. Now it makes perfect sense to me.
 Photo by Ernst Vikne
'Alone time' is important for French children. Learning to play by themselves and become self-reliant is highly valued. I was scolded for spending hours drawing and cutting paperdolls by myself.
"Why don't you go outside and play like other kids", I was told relentlessly. I never paid attention then and I still don't go outside enough probably.
 The one subject Druckerman doesn't go into in depth is the French doudou. Perhaps that's my turf to map out. Qui sait?
Clearly you don't have to have kids to find Bringing Up Bebe fascinating. If France interests you (would you be here if it didn't) then you'll learn much about French culture. Druckerman's book is hilarious, laugh-out loud funny to boot. I'll address French food issues tomorrow. Bear has a lot to contribute. Watch a WSJ video of Druckerman here. And here is Druckerman en famille in Paris & NYC.
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Marshmallow Madness

Should you happen to go to Motorinos for a clam pizza (tres delish) on 349 E. 12th street... You're a 5 minute walk from Birdbath Bakery (at 223 1st Avenue)and the best home made marshmallows on the planet.
I do not say this lightly, especially after 3 days of intensive research and furtive gobbling.
Birdbath is a 'green' offshoot (one of 5 in the city) of City Bakery
You can buy a 10-pack ($10) or by the piece ($1) as I prefer for freshness...
I spotted packets of marshmallows at Balthazar but none sold individually.
I thought I was addicted to French guimauve but last weekend I was converted to the American way.
Why is it that when you've eaten something all your life you think you own it. Not so. As a candy, marshmallows go back to ancient Egypt when mixed with honey and for medicinal purposes using the marshmallow plant. The 19th century French version of the recipe, called pâte de guimauve (or "guimauve" for short), included egg white meringue and was often flavored with rose water. French candy shop owners used to make it on the premises. La Mere du Famile makes wonderful loops of marshmallow but they are much dryer and less sticky than City Bakery's (they must have a longer shelf life).
In 1948 American Alex Doumak invented a way for marshmallows to be manufactured in a fully automated way - extruded in soft cylinders and then cut.
Thank you Wikipedia
Photo by Jacob Margolis/NPR

Recipes for the homemade marshmallow abound. NPR has a nice one. Smitten Kitchen and David Lebovitz will show you how to do it yourself.
I don't trust myself around the lava-like marshmallow. I'll stick with picking up a few daily at City bakery and then seeing how long I can keep them in the house (24 hours is tops so far)
Birdbath (but not City Bakery) has nice stocking stuffer 10-packs of small gingerbread men for $5.
Shhh...here's a hot chocolate tip: Trader Joe's for the holidays has a peppermint hot chocolate($4.95) exactly like William Sonoma's hot chocolate ($19.95). TJ's tin is green but the inside is exactly the same yummy chocolate flakes.

ENJOY!
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